Where I Am & How Far I’ve Gone
It’s day 6 and I’m currently sitting in a parking lot in Oceanside—or at least I think that’s where I am. Honestly, I’ve been through so many cities today, I’ve lost count. Maybe 20? Maybe more. The coast all kind of looks the same after a while.
I didn’t make it to San Diego like I thought I might. Phoenix is probably my next stop. I’ve been telling myself that for a while now, though, so who knows. I’ve been procrastinating, lingering, dragging my feet on leaving California, even though I’m definitely over it. I just need to go.
I’ve been on the road for almost two weeks now. I’ve driven down from Seattle through Oregon, across California, all the way to Southern California. It took almost a week to get here, but I made it. I genuinely can’t believe I drove all the way down the West Coast. It wasn’t even on my bucket list, but it feels like I should definitely add it now, just so I can check it off.
Day 6: Main Updates
Right now, I’m in a parking lot eating a salad and debating whether to stay here for the night or keep driving. There’s a $20 parking lot with cold showers nearby, but I’m not sure it’s worth it. There are community pools with showers for a few bucks too, so maybe I’ll check those out.
Oh, and my car? It’s clean, at least on the outside. I washed it today, and it’s shiny. Inside, though? Still gross. The seats need to be shampooed because they were nasty when I bought the car, and now they’re full of my sweat and tears too because I’ve totally cried in the car a few times. The emotions from this experience come in waves—overwhelming one minute and incredible the next. But either way I’m having fun, far more fun than I’d be having at home in my apartment.
I also got a solar battery, so I’m finally moving up in the world of road trip living. I can boil water now if I want to, which is great since I packed my electric kettle and rice cooker (like how/why did that make sense??). I haven’t even figured out how to use the propane stove I brought… maybe one day I’ll actually learn how to cook from my car.
Insights from Day 6
Today was a mix of beauty and frustration. California sunsets are freaking beautiful, and driving across the country in a manual car has been a blast. I’m getting so much better at it. But then there’s the constant stress of trying to figure out where to pee. I had to try like four different places earlier just to find someone that would let me use their bathroom. That might be the most annoying part of all this—finding basic human necessities. Like, everyone uses the bathroom, so I really don’t understand why businesses feel empowered to restrict access to them.
I’ve also been thinking a lot about what I’m doing and why. I hate sleeping in my car in cities. It’s not just about safety—though that’s part of it. It’s more about how it feels, and it doesn’t feel good. I’m not homeless—I’m doing this because I want to, not because I have to—but the shame creeps in anyway and it starts to feel like I am, and I hate that. But then I see people who are actually homeless and I start to question myself, sometimes I wonder if maybe I’m wrong.
I don’t want to feel bad for what I’m doing just because other people project their shame onto me. Those beliefs aren’t mine. That perception isn’t mine. It’s not my reality—it’s theirs. The only reason I even think about this kind of stuff is because people have been so insistent on telling me how I “should” feel, how I “should” see myself, or what I “should” think about my choices. It’s all just noise, and I’m done with it. I’m trying to erase all of that programming.
Why not make living in our cars classy?
Why should anyone feel ashamed for wanting to travel the country, live simply, and explore freedom? Just don’t do it like me—don’t cram your car with every single thing you own because then you’ll have to figure out how to get rid of it all along the way. Also, on that note: constantly picking up useful things without ditching the stuff you don’t need isn’t helpful. I really wish I’d would’ve gotten a storage unit before I left.
Tips and Advice for Car Living
- Bathrooms are a Nightmare: I think this is my only real “plan ahead”. Outside of rest stops, your best bet is grocery store chains (Safeway, Kroger), Walmarts, Wincos, and fast food restaurants. Also, community centers are a lifesaver for showers—they’re cheap (like ~$5) and you can usually swim or use the wifi too.
- Keep Your Car Clean: Wash your car when you can. Even a clean outside can help make the internal chaos a little less overwhelming.
- Solar Battery = Game Changer: If you’re road-tripping, consider investing in one. I use mine to charge electronics and power a small desk fan. Putting too much stress on your car’s battery can damage the alternator… no one wants a dead car anywhere, let alone 2000 miles away from home.
- Food in a Cooler is Temporary: Don’t rely on a cooler for long-term food storage. It’s just not worth the hassle–even breakfast or short-term snacks are a waste because ice is like $3-4/bag. Besides, grocery stores are everywhere.
State-Specific Thoughts – California
It’s day 6 of this trip and I’ve spent way too many of them in Cali. It’s beautiful, but once you’ve seen one coastal city, you’ve kind of seen them all. The weather is amazing, though, and people here have some really nice cars.
I’m ready to move on. The middle states have more wilderness, which means more camping and less city sleeping. Nevada, Arizona, Utah—hot, sure, but at least it’ll be something new.
Dos and Don’ts for Road Tripping (Day 6)
Do:
• Find safe, legal places to park or camp. Look up state/county/city laws. California has like no rest stops, so if you don’t want to pay for camping then be prepared to sleep in parking lots and highway turnoffs.
• Invest in tools like a solar battery or propane stove.
• Take care of your car and try to shower and stay clean. The mental health boost you get from a $10 carwash and a $5 shower is absolutely worth the cost.
Don’t:
• Use the Overlander website. It’s not helpful when every spot is either outside people’s houses or overrun with other campers. Personally, I’d rather sleep in a Walmart parking lot than on a side street. At least there’s bathroom and food access.
• Let shame from other people’s opinions dictate your experiences in life. This is your journey—own it and love every minute of it.
• Pack everything you own into your car—it’s a logistical nightmare. I promise you do not need 90% of the stuff you think you need. And if it turns out that I’m wrong and you do need something? Guess what—there are stores everywhere.
Lessons from Day 6 on the Road
This trip is teaching me to let go of shame and to ignore the voices—both internal and external—that try to make me feel bad for living my life the way I want to. This isn’t homelessness; it’s freedom. It’s the adventure I’ve dreamed of. I’m learning to trust myself and my choices.
I’m also realizing how much I’ve internalized beliefs that aren’t mine. The shame of what people might think, of not fitting into some societal box—none of that actually matters. It’s a process, but I’m working to erase all that stuff that only serves to keep me trapped and miserable.
It’s late, and I still haven’t decided if I’m staying here tonight or driving on. But what I do know is that I’m finally ready to leave California behind. The ocean’s been nice, but it’s time for something new. Las Vegas and the heat are calling me.
As always, don’t forget to share your revelations with me below ♡
Until next time,
Audrey
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